music: dido - do you have a little time (life for rent) now the normal person would have put a picture of jack skelton and the rest of the characters from 'nightmare before christmas' on here but instead im saving that for halloween!

right hand still not healed up. me and my dad changed the computers over yesterday and so i get to use my computer rather than my crappy brothers one! yeah! but you cant even begin to imagine how hard it was to do with one hand! but i got it done and here i am... both hands intact!

my mum tried to crush it when we went out to get some woodchip for the mystical forest part of our front garden. it has a mystical forest and a beach! its me and my magical innocence. i always believed there was a secret garden hidden behind the cat-sheds, but there never was so i decided to make my dream come true.

my mum also treated to me to a skull. (im not paying �500 on ebay for one thank you very much!) well she wouldnt let me have a pumpkin that i said i wanted to buy (they were half price) and she said it wasnt a good idea despite the fact i said id buy it!

but that was the only halloween item in 3garden shops and 1pet place! the rest was all decorated with christmas stuff and its nearer halloween! grrrr!

the self-harm got a bit worse last night. took some pills but they didnt work. just made me pass out and more dizzier this morning.

theres an appointment waiting for me at this place tomorrow and im a bit nervous but know its good for me. if im honest the whole thing isnt me... its a self-destructive me. but thats an excuse.

i cant have excuses. i need reality so here i shall trot off to this place tomorrow. i cant not as my mother is going with me

otherwise theres a life going for rent!